5 Signs You're Ready to Leave Your Job

It was a Sunday morning and I was chatting to a good friend about her experience in consulting. The conversation kept rounding back to the refrain "I know I need to leave, it just never feels like the right time". It wasn't the first time I had heard this, and I get it. Consulting keeps you on the case merry-go-round. Just when you think you're going to have time to "take a step back" and consider what it is you really want to be doing, you're roped into a DD, or a proposal, or another 3-6 monthlong case.. and you're back to the "when this is over" refrain. 

This is a d.a.n.g.e.r.o.u.s. cycle, because the inevitable outcome is you never get around to deciding if now is ACTUALLY the right time to leave (much less taking action on that decision).

So, I thought I'd write down the five surefire signs that you cannot delay starting the process of finding your next amazing opportunity. And if you are hesitant to even read these (probably because you're like, oh sh*t, she's about to call me out)... trust me when I say the liberation that comes with committing to leaving is worth it. Like that first sip of coffee in the morning, life will start returning to your extremities, eventually reaching the place where your passion, interests and regenerative curiosity lie (sounds dramatic, but it's a real sensation of feeling EXCITED about what is coming next). But, I digress. Let's get into the list so you can determine for yourself if it's time to leave your job (and move onto your next amazing opportunity)! 

1. Your physical or mental health is consistently impacted

Listen, there will be stressful nights. There will be slide decks that give you a migraine, and there will be weeks where you'll sacrifice a workout or two to meet a deadline. These experiences are not ideal, however they are temporary and are part and parcel with most types of rigorous work.

What you want to look out for is when these experiences are recurring, or if they have manifested into a chronic pain or mental/emotional symptom. For example, you have a headache EVERY day for five days straight. You are losing (or gaining) weight and are not able to identify why or create and maintain healthy habits to get back to your baseline. You experience chronic pain linked to stress, such as neck pain, wrist pain or back pain. You are experiencing new and ongoing mental health issues, such as panic attacks, intense anxiety or shortness of breath.

It is easy when we are young to assume we can push our minds and bodies to the brink day after day, week after week. And it's true, you might be physically able to do this, for a time. However, whether in the short term or the long term, the "score" is truly being kept by your body, and there will be consquences. It's up to you to answer, "Is this worth it?"

2. You *literally* dread Monday morning

There are the Sunday Scaries, and then there's the thought "I don't know how I'm going to get through another week." If you can't remember the last time you started a week EXCITED about the prospect of contributing to your project, engaging with your team, manager and clients, and being pushed to do good, hard work... this is not normal. Purpose, excitement and meaning in our work leads us to perform at a high level, and come "home" satisfied with what we've contributed. These are not things you should consistently compromise on.

So many of my clients have started our work together expressing the belief that there couldn't POSSIBLY be a job out there that people look forward to... Trust me, this is just something you tell yourself to make yourself feel better about being miserable (tough love). There are 100% jobs that you look forward to engaging in, that give you purpose, meaning and energy. Do not settle for being miserable.

If you’re already thinking “dang, I gotta go, but I have NO idea where to start”, quick grab this free workbook that walks you through five questions that will help plan your great escape.

3. Your learning has plateaued

One of the biggest selling points of management consulting is all of the learning you will experience. For many of us (me included, back in 2012), this may be your first fulltime work experience, and you're eager to get beyond "just" having internship experience. It's incredibly attractive to join a company and industry that puts so much emphasis on teaching you skills, frameworks and working styles that will serve you for the rest of your career. Learning to build an excel model, structure an approach to a complex problem and manage a senior client relationship ARE valuable, and will make you an asset in your future roles. I can say, four years post-consulting, these skills (and others learned on the job) are one of the primary reasons I will never REGRET working in consulting.

However, there comes a point where this learning starts to platteau.. you've mastered many of the basic consultant skillsets, and now are being pushed like a dog to churn out more and more work. There is often the perception that the better you become, the easier the job will be. While that is true in some regards, unfortunately it often means you will simply have MORE work to do. So the thing that you're stuck learning is how to write a 100 slides instead of 50, without going insane by the inanity of the process. 

4. You are not acting like yourself

This one can be really subtle and difficult to pin down, but it is one of the most important signs to look for. Whether due to stress, a culture that's misaligned with your values, or something else, I have often heard clients speak about not recognizing themselves after a couple years in consulting. It's natural to assimilate to our environment. As humans, we are oriented to community, and to perceiving ourselves as part of the "in group". So, don't give yourself a hard time about it, but do be aware and adjust accordingly.

Whether you find yourself saying something to a colleague, friend or family member that just doesn't sound like you, or you act out in a way (in a personal or professional environment) that you're not proud of... take note. Your personality, your beliefs, experiences and values, are what make you unique, valuable, and an interesting and vibrant human. When we feel disconnected from the things that make us.. us, our inspiration, motivation and endurance are soon to follow. 

5. You do not have role models that you aspire to be like

Ultimately, our lives and careers are dramatically shaped by the people we look up to. Having mentors and role models who you truly aspire to be like, and would be proud to live the life of 5, 10 or 20 years from now, are the people you want to be spending your time with. If you find yourself scratching your head trying to decide if your current manager or mentors are people you aspire to be like, they're not. When you are following a leader who you deeply admire, you will want to shout it from the rooftops, and it will be easy to sing their praises. 

Your life (and career) are too short to be working for people who don't inspire you.

Let's check in.

How many of the above would you check off?  If you deeply relate to 3+ .. it might be time that you start thinking about next steps.  There are a million different ways to craft a career and a life. Do not be convinced that just because this is your reality today, it needs to be your reality tomorrow.

Say this with me 3x, "I deserve to be happy and excited by my work." 

And, if you're pretty convinced you DO need to leave.. but don't know where to start, I've put together this very simple & effective workbook to help you get started on thinking about the WHAT of your tomorrow. I guarantee answering these 5 questions will spark your inner motivation and surprise you with the insight and clarity that comes through.

Who am I?

Hi! If you're new here, my name is Julia Starr and I am a life and career coach. I started my career at the Boston Consulting Group and worked there as both an Associate and Consultant before leaving to pivot into a career in adult development psychology. Four years later I've attended my dream school (the Harvard Graduate School of Education), launched two businesses, and find fulfillment in my work on a daily basis. In short, I help other people find clarity on their own career goals, and support them in taking the steps they need to design the life and career path that serves THEM - their happiness, priorities and values.

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